--Roberts Connection: Day on3--

I thought I should talk about my time at RWC. I was very antsy when I got there because we were oh so fashionably late. We weren’t late late…but we were late. If you made any sense of that then thumbs up to you. What I mean exactly is there was a 2 hour check in time window and we (who live <=15 min away) got there at around 2:55. So I went in and got my T-shirt and room number and all and headed back to the car so I can unload my stuff. My mom was kind of annoying me because she was talking on my cellphone and she was talking SO LOUD. I kept whispering ‘inside voice’ but she just gave me an angry look. So after that lovely note we headed to my room for the night. Apparently me and keys do not go well together. I had trouble opening two out of two of the doors. Luckily no one was really around to see me struggle or it would be embarrassing lol. So I dropped off my bag, saw the sign on the door that had my room mate and my name. He wasn’t there so I put on my Roberts T-Shirt and headed to the CLC auditorium for the first event. Oh that’s right, THE ROBERTS CUP. Little did I know this involved running? I held up good though. Wasn’t the fastest on my 12 person team but I was far from the slowest. We had to go all over campus and solve riddles. It took out group about 45 minutes to an hour and we came in second. It was kind of fun but at the same time it kind of wasn’t. It started down pouring half way through and we had to keep going (and the rest of my teams challenges were outside). SOOoo, we finally finished (2nd) and went back to the auditorium. This girl started talking to me, which my mom passed along to my family as flirting, but some people don’t understand the difference of being nice and flirting. So it was time to eat so I headed over to the garlock dinning hall with my mom. We ate and I could tell she was jonesing to leave for the night. So I walked her to the car at 6:45 and headed to my room to try and meet my roommate. He wasn’t there so I headed down to the auditorium for the next lecture type thing. When that was done they announced that the bon fire was cancelled due to the rain earlier. So instead we went to the BT’s Café to watch live music. The guy was pretty good, he literally knows, every song lol. So I watched him for 45 minutes then they announced that the movie was starting in a few minutes so I started walking to the auditorium to see it. On my way there I became part of a group because two girls started talking to me and the kid next to me so the four of us ended up walking to the movie together and sat together. They were awesome. So the movie was the blind side. It was sad/funny. I finally met my room mate when I went back. We talked for about three hours before we both ended up falling asleep. Day two will come later

--Worship Night--

“For we are the circumcision, who worship God in the Spirit, rejoice in Christ Jesus, and have no confidence in the flesh” – Philippians 3:3

Well today was my second night of the beach worship ministry. This night felt different. Was it because of the rain or the fact that the annual Harbor Fest was going on? ….Possibly. We decided to do it anyways, I mean it’s not like it was down pouring, it was only sprinkling. So my sisters and I arrive at the beach and it was CROWDED. There were tents, there were rides, police on bikes, if you can think of it, it was probably at the beach that night. So we meet up with the guitar player and Cajon player and find that our regular spot is basically closed. We usually meet at the beginning of the pier but the pier was closed off for whatever reason. So we moved down a bit to the crowd. I was pretty nervous here tonight, it wasn’t a regular night, it was far more crowded. So to continue on, we went on with the night and gained a few more regulars (two more guitar players and a guitar players girlfriend). I had a lot of fun like usual. I don’t bring my guitar because there are already so many guitar players that it seems pointless. I don’t think it will sound very good to try and get four guitars to play in sync, it just not going to happen. I did play on someone else’s guitar though. Played a few songs and it was great. It gives me hope that I will be able to have a band in college. I think it would be awesome to be in a band.

There was a lot of spiritual warfare going on, but I think it turned out great for a special event night. If it was a regular day at the beach then I would think it was insane.

First you have the angry lady with the kid. Her daughter was looking at us and the mom says “Don’t look at them, you’re only encouraging them”. There was the two creepy guys. There were teens making out in front of us (which was very odd btw), there was the kid who put a lighter over one of our guitar players and said “I think they get the point, and the occasional non-whisper whisper “they should go to jail”. I’m not dwelling on the bad though. There were a lot of random Christians that came up to worship with us. Even people who aren’t Christian walked by nodding there head with the music smiling. I think it turn out to be pretty successful. Hopefully we will be having it again this upcoming Saturday. Can’t wait, love this ministry.

Glory to god (Beach Worship Ministry)

"Glory to God
Glory to God
Glory to God, forever

Take my life and let it be
All for You and for Your glory
Take my life and let it be Yours"

These words were deeply sang as I sat at the pier for my first night of the beach worship ministry. This song (and our god is greater, but that's obvious) were really deep to me.

To start, if you don't know (like I didn't), what the beach Worship ministry is...It's a group of Christians that meet at Charlotte beach pier to do worship. Like I said this was my first time so I didn't know what to expect. I was thinking it was going to be in one of the pavillions secluded....well I was wrong.

I arrived with my sisters and was a bit nervous but went with it. So 7 o'clock came and we headed for the pier to meet the other people. I didn't know anyone there which was pretty fun. I never spent time with Christians I don't know. So we got to the beginning of the pier and that's when I got really nervous. Here we were, 5 or 6 Christians with a couple of guitars and acoustic drums (Cajun sp?) playing our Christian music as hundreds of people walked by every few minutes. Pretty nerve racking. I mean there were "Gansters", bikers, drunk people. I really didn't know what would happen.

So we started playing and I started to feel better because more and more people were coming. At one point we were up to 20 christians rocking out on our acoustics and singing, pure worship.

A (semi) funny debate started. After the first couple songs someone saw a piece of garbage on the ground (one of those trays you get your French fries in) and dropped like a dollar in change in there thinking it was our "tip" jar. It started a chain reaction and ended up having 5 or so people drop money in there. So the debate was weather to keep it there and donate the money or to close it so it stays purely about god and not seem like we are playing for money. So we ended up closing it (which I agree with).

I didn't bring my guitar cause it was only my first time, didn't want to jump the gun. But I did play a song on guitar.

To wrap up, i felt like this experience really helped me to grow more as a Christian. I have a problem with being up front about my relationship with God. This really helped me get over that fear. At first I was looking around like crazy, "Is someone i know going to see me". But by the end I wasn't bothered at all. There we a bunch of random Christians that came up to worship with us which was great. You could really feel the presence of god working there. I know that I will definitly be going back. I will probably be real nervous again but it's normal rational fear. The kind that helps you grow. I think God will do amazing things in this ministry and Im so happy to be a part of it. So what is your fear? Maybe you have the same fears as me, and you're scared to be bold about the love you have for Christ. I will give you this advice. Don't be afraid to step out of your comfort zone. Pray about it and if you are sincere, God will give you the determination. What ever your fears are as a Christian, I encourage you to stand it up David and Goliath style. What are you going to do when the oppertunity comes?

-----------
On a side note. I have to say about the guy who gave us a ride home. We were blasting this rock music (Christian screamo type) and we pulled up this red light, it's like 11 or 12 at night at this point. We raced had a street race with car next to us. It was AWSOME. Can't wait till college. When I'm on my own terms (I am going to a Christian college so no over reacting lol)

MECHii update

I don't think I'm going to build MECHii. RF transmitters and recievers are out of my budget. Ironically it's cheaper for me to build the self driving one so I am going to go with that. Anyways I went to radio shack and bought the parts I needed to make a prototype light module. After an hour or so I gave up. I needed to clear my head because I couldn't get the script right. So after an apifiny(sp?) I realized how to write the program. Build a prototype and I was successful. I was able to run it without computer too. Then I spent about an hour doing it write using actual wire and putting in all four LEDs. It works now. I will post pics and/or video tommarow. So happy

MECHii

I am starting a summer project and I hope to start this week. I am building a Robotic controlled human interface rover...(Took me so long to think of that name lol). I am naming it MECHii, since I love mechanical engineering. The name is great IMO.

I have uploaded three pictures of it. One is the logo I created which I will eventually somehow get printed as a clear backing sticker, I will put it on my MECHii. I also will add the logo to any and all documents about it. I have really high hopes for this project. The other two pictures are two renders from my sketchup module I created. Its mostly drawn from scale. I figure the overall body of MECHii will be 1'x8"...I am not sure...I want it to be about 90% of a square and I am guessing those measurement, I havent actually got a ruler out to measure it.

Mechii is going to be broken down into two parts...MECHii and MECHii V2. MECHii one is the basics. It will be the design of the most crucial parts of the robot and the aesthetics of it.

MECHii will be composed of two main electronic modules. Lighting Module and Driving Module. Lighting Module is in control of the lighting of the rover (go figure). There will be two super bright LED's in the front to serve as head lights. There will also be two red LED's in the back. These will be controlled by a photo-resistor and my arduino. In a nutshell it will be like this. The arduino will read the amount of light from the photo-resistor and then if its less than or equal to X, the four LED's will come on

ex: (Not in actual programming language, simplifying it so its understandable)

if light <=X
{
turn 4 LED's on
}
else
lights off

The driving module is going to be a little bit more difficult. I want to have four motors controlled by the new rf control sheild for the arduino. It has four channels (one for each motor). I cant get into the motor to much because there is so much I have to work out with it such as size, voltage, etc... This project will be done by the end of the summer. Easier said then done because I have to buy some stuff online

-------------------------------------------------------
MECHii V2
This wont be any time soon and that is mainly just because of the cost to create this. It is going to be self driving. It will have a iR sensor and ultrasonic ranger finder. Those will be use to drive it without hitting anything. There will be a wireless webcam attached operating on the 802.11...im not sure what else but the main idea is that I can let it loose, get on to my laptop, watch as it drives.
------------------------------------------------------------
I think the main reason I want to create this, besides for the obvious ttoonnss of fun that will come out of it. It will put my foot into the door of mechanical/electrical/aerospace engineering. I also want to be able to brag about this. I don't want any help on actually building it. I want to personally drill every hole, solder every connection, etc. I will probably have to do a lot of online seaching for the theory behind it. The aesthetics are going to be great on MECHii. There will be the plastic glass type stuff as the overall body. Its going to be drilled and screwed on to two parallel metal L trim frame. The metal L frame is going to have two spots per frame. Each one of these holes will be the wheel hole. I hope to maybe buy an LED rope for underlighting, that would also be controlled by the photo-resistor. I want to get three stickers attached to it. I want my MECHii sticker with the clear backing attached to the plastic frame. I want to get another custom sticker that says "This is ^NOT a toy" the '^' and the 'not' will be in red and wrote above the rest of the letters like it was added after. The other one is just the radiation warning sticker.

Like I said I have high hopes for this project and hope that it keeps my summer really fun. Gooood luck aaron

The mentor, the project, the friend, and the future

==The Mentor==
Today I spent the day with one of the most important person. He is kind of like a mentor to me. He is nice but not to nice. To be a mentor you need to to be nice but you have to be a little mean I think. Mean isn't the best word but I can't think of it. Basically you have to be able to inflict fear. Fear keeps us in check IMO. It helps us to grow. If a mentor doesn't inflict fear then there is no growth on either side. I can't really explain it. Everyone should already know anyways.

==The project==
I have a project. Should be interesting. ^.^ ... More on that later

==The friend==
one of my friends hasn't been talking to me. I don't know if she is busy or if I made her mad and she didn't tell me. Idk, I don't want to initiate the talking so probably a little my fault a little. I guess I just want to see if she notices we haven't talked.

==the future==
I paid my down payment, did my TAP, did my FASFA. That's all. I am officially going to Roberts and as of right now I will be dorming which is sweet.

Maybe

Maybe

When I look up at the sky
I wonder if you're alone too
And if you feel the way I do
Cold and lonely with nobody home

I think that I miss you
But I can't really tell
You've seemed to be a part of me
That I don't really even know

I wish I could understand
What I am going through
Maybe that's why I haven't told you yet
Because I don't understand it at all

One day Ill know
Exactly what I want
Maybe you'll be here
Maybe you will not

Lonely hearts club

I don't know. I feel very lonely tonight :(

The Man Who Can't Be Moved...

My first attempt at making a music video. This was just a short thing I did to test out. It was going to get dark soon and brother wasn't to happy about being force to do it. I think it came out fairly good though. For best results I would right click the video and go to 'watch on youtube'

Ocean floor

Women's retreat...

Well this weekend I had to run sound for a women's retreat. First day was ok, little akward. I was sitting there off in space when I realize everyone in the room was crying about the teaching. Im like...o.k... Well I ended up done earlier then expected which was nice.

Today I went back and it was pretty long. There was three teaching within 5 hours or so. My attention span can barely handle one. Well its was a lot to deal with but its over now. I was really happy to get a thank you text. It reminded me of why I do this. it felt kind of nice to get acknowledged, but not in a prideful way lol.

Sorry....

Something I wrote. Its not a poem and its not a song. Its somewhere between the two lol. Its more of a free verse of what I'm trying to say. Unedited, has more meaning.

These streets never seemed so empty
since our last goodbye
I'm so far away from home now
running from my own lie

But you showed me now
This is what I have to do
If i can ever forget you
Im sorry things didnt come out
the way that you planed
But things change for the best
but im sorry

Time passes by slowly
Counting every second down
Till the moment comes
where you would normally call
I guess it's just an empty night now

But you showed me now
This is what I have to do
If i can ever forget you
Im sorry things didnt come out
the way that you planed
But plans change for the best
but im sorry

I tried so hard to make you see
what you became
And why its not fair to me
The battles already lost
there's no use in fighting
for something thats already gone
im already gone

But you showed me now
This is what I have to do
If i can ever forget you
Im sorry things didnt come out
the way that you planed
But things change for the best
but im sorry
im sorry

=======
Sincerly,
Aaron Kaye
=======

Cause I'm gonna lose ya...

Really like this song, has a very deep meaning, or at least to me it does...



I'm, taking a ride, off to one side,
It is a personal thing
Where, when I can't stand up
In this cage I'm not regretting.
I don't need a better thing,
I'll settle for less.
It's another thing for me,
I just have to wander through this world. Alone.

Stop, before you fall
Into the hole that I have dug here.
Rest, even as you
Are starting to feel the way I used to.
I don't need a better thing,
Just to sound confused.
Don't talk about everyone,
I am not amused...by you.

Cuz Im gonna lose ya
Yes, Im gonna lose ya
If Im gonna lose ya
Cuz Im gonna lose ya
Yes, Im gonna lose ya
If Im gonna lose ya, I'll lose ya now for good.

Start of something new...

"And you could, throw away your expectations now.
And all the things you wouldn't say out loud,
theres nothing left to pick apart now,
the cards are all down"

Well it feels so weird now. I spent the last six or so months planing out possible outcomes for my future, and now its here. Everything is all figured out. it feels a little weird, almost hard to except. No more SAT's or applications. Im home. Now all I have to do is make it through the next 90 something days till I graduate.

I had a great conversation with someone about dorming and I really liked his ideas because they were exactly what I was thinking. Dorming is important for college, admit it. My dad decided to throw me a bone and say that we can talk about moving into an apartment with sisters out in chili. We'll see how that goes. I can only say one thing. Next september I will not be here. I will do everything in my will to make sure that I get to dorm...

It is what it is...

Well apparently I didn't get in to RIT. I don't know how I feel about that. Haven't had time alone with my thoughts yet.I am a little disappoited, but im not 'mad'. I felt like I was fully adequate, my GPA is like a 3.6. SAT scores, not to good but its around the same as tons of people I know that got in. I don't feel sorrow at all, I only feel like I let people down. Everyone had this high expectation and I couldn't reach it. I'm not going to start rationalizing this as character growth or it just wasn't right. It is what it is. I'm content with going to Roberts wesleyan. I think it has a lot to offer me and I have a lot to offer it. It just seems weird that its all done now. No more figuring out where I am going to go. This is it, new home. I am happy that I don't have to wait anymore. All the pieces fell together. I am going to go for engineering at Roberts. Its a pretty fine christian school with hopefully the soon to be mrs.Kaye, if I can find her ;)

Human expectations

"I have (I have) you breathing down my neck (breathing down my neck)
I don't (don't know) what you could possibly expect under this condition so
I'll wait (I'll wait) for the ambulance to come (ambulance to come)
Pick us up off the floor
What did you possibly expect under this condition so"

I feel like lately I've had this big weight on my shoulder, but I couldn't show it because it would show how vulnerable I am. Everyone is expecting me to get in to Rochester Institute of Technology. All I hear left and right, "Did you get in, did you get in"

People don't know but my greatest flaw is the needing to please everyone. It really just ends up taking a huge toll on me mentally.

I honestly don't mind my second choice school. Its not a big deal to me. But I have the world telling me what I want and it makes it difficult to deal.

I am suppose to find out this week. One thought comes to mind, what if I don't get in? How am I suppose to tell everyone. This is all getting blown out of proportion...

New blog account...

Well, its been along time since I blogged anything. I don't like looking back at my blogs and I wanted one that no one knows about, (unless I tell them). So I decided to make up a new account. Hopefully I can start actually using it again. Ive had a lot on my mind. Hopefully this one will be neater and I will actually organize it instead of just a huge day by day diary (or the more manly way, journal)...